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Its cool!

R.I.P Uncle Bill (11-19-08)

My uncle died yesterday. He was only in his 50's. Isn't that sad? Apparently he had a massive hart attack when he was up on a latter in his garage.

He fell.

I cried.

very sad day for my family.

At first i was sad. But everybody is sad when someone you know dies right? I couldn't stop thinking about how the day before i was thinking about seeing him this year and fishing with him. But then i thought, he's going home now. . .good.

My parents do not know if my Uncle believed in Jesus, or if he went to church every Sunday. when i asked my dad if he went to heaven. He told me that he did not know.

Here is a summary of our conversation:

Me: At least he is in heaven now. . . He's happy.

Dad: I don't know. . .the bible is very specific. . (I don't remember the rest. .)

Me: God wouldn't turn down a good soul. I don't think he would reject someone who hadn't found Jesus yet. . would he?

In the end I got frustrated. My dad told me what he believed, and no matter how hard i tried, i could not make him tell me what i need to hear, or answer my questions. He didn't know.

I'm talking to My youth paster on Sunday.

I'm tired of not being able to do what i want to do.

1.) I want to see california, but i can't. . .maybe when i can drive. . .

2.) I want to drive.(but that will happen soon!)

3.) I wish i could ACT(TV).

4.) I want to see a broadway in New York. I guess i'll have to wait until i can work.

5.) Everyone in my family tells me i should be a hand model. Well, Why can't we try it? Oh, right. Stupid money.

6.) I really do not like the color of my room, but i have to live with it until we can get money.

7.) I really didn't want Obama for president, but i have to live with that.

8.) I'm tired of letting friends put me down. I'm getting frustrated.

9.) I don't like not having everything my friends have.

I don't know why i'm not content with my life-style. I have a roof over my head, family that loves me. Food. School. I have much more that half of the world does. But i still want to achive more. Does that make me selfish? Should i be worried. I haven't even finished 10th grade. And I'm ready to book it to California. . . Arghhh!

**screams on the inside**

On the better side, i love performing in my play, its GREAT! And i played candyland and go-fish in youthgroup. FUN!

Life is complicated. I'm not much of the type of girl who will flirt, so how do i let a guy know i'm seriously interested in him? My problem is that the guy a like has a girlfriend. This girlfriend treats him like crap. And I can tell that he is Unhappy. I think that the only reason he stays with her is because "she gives him what he wants"(A.K.A She's a slut) I watched her get him upset almost a billion times during homecoming, and her was to a solution is kissing him and dancing around. ARGH! Whats wrong with me?? ?I just don't get it. But i have to admit, watching him try to learn the electric slide is HILARIOS! HAHA!


My first performance for my play is on friday. WOOT! I'm totally stoked. If i could ever be on Broadway, i would. I LOVES IT!!

Anything else you might say? I have a headache. I have some sort of report due tomorrow. Crap. It's a collage, and i have half of my pictures. My GPA dropped way below what i wanted it to, and i am working on restoring it. And TWILIGHT COMES OUT IN 16 DAYS!!! WOOT! HAHA. The paramore music video was awsome.

I really need an I-Pod. Seriously. Bad. I'm going to use all of my christmas money (If i get any. . stupid money problems) to get one. TWILGHT SOUNDTRACK RELEASE TOMORROW!

See ya,

~~*A silly girl who says goodbye to invisible people and who has a headache*~~

I have discovered my love for Sarah Dessen books. I've only read 2 but i've heard the rest are very good as well. They have amazing messages and you can completely relate to the main character. I read "This lullaby" first and i REALLY LIKED IT. I don't really remember the name of the main character but i do know that i will always remember Dexter's name. 4-6 years in the future and i probably will still tell you that the name of the tall dorky singer with red hair in "this lullaby" was Dexter. Probably like i will never forget Edward Cullen's name. Or the name Carlisle(I LOVE THAT NAME!) or Jasper. I'm Started Reading "Just Listen" this morning on my way to church and i think that it is amazing.

My best friend told me that she hated breaking dawn. I LOVED IT. I personally still read the last part of the book over and over again, and I've taken a serious liking to the character Kate. So far, she is one of my favorite characters in breaking dawn, i also like Benjamin. Who wouldn't love to control the elements? I remember being little and acting like i could control the elements. BUT WOULDN'T THAT BE COOL??? but yes, I LIKE BREAKING DAWN! I've read reviews saying that nobody can relate to bella anymore because she's now married, is a mother, AND a vampire at 18. but why can't you still relate to her? she's the same person to me, and i can still understand what she's saying when she's a vampire!

When i was at my friends house, she told me what she expected of breaking dawn. Her version was hilarious but it put a damper on it when she killed jasper. WHY JASPER! Couldn't she kill paul? that would have been sad, but better than jasper. . . AND THEN MY MOM CAME. My mom, friend and her mother sat outside and talked about how Robert Pattinson is ugly and a terrible edward, IN FRONT OF ME! A ROBERT PATTINSON FAN! They thought it was funny. . .

I Found out that i could play softball today. I hit the ball a lot, it was exiting! but our team lost because almost everyone on the other team was shorter than the paster. . . ARGH!

My boring amazingly Hot/weird day

The Day:

1. Woke up to my non-weirdly hyper brother.

2. Ate a bowl of granola and a banana.

3. Drove to our church to drop off brother for camp, and to help with VBS.

4. Got both of my youth ministers to read twilight.

5. Helped with VBS, the only exiting thing about it was running projection.

6. Left Church.

7. Slept.

8. Cleaned out garage for garage sale.

9. Ate hot dog for dinner.

10. Found out about an awesome new still from twilight

11. Started the second summer of the sisterhood.

12. Watched Sahara.

13. Typed this out.

Isn't that amazing? VBS is cool. who doesn't love little kids songs about gods fruit? Yeah, its midnight and i really want to get some sleep. BYE!

xoxoxo Jayce*Lane

Breaking Dawn quotes: (i will keep updating this post.)

#21. Alice: "I’ll play you for it. Rock, paper, scissors."
Edward: "Why don’t you just tell me who wins?"
Alice: "I do. Excellent."

#2o. Bella: “Oh, Mike! How will I go on?”

#19. Tanya: “Ah, Edward. I’ve missed you.”

#18. Emmett: “Oooo, scary.”

#17. Bella: “Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You’re not taking him to a strip club, are you?"

#16. Charlie: “Bells, we’re up to bat.”

#15. Edward: “You’re awfully small to be so hugely irritating.”

#14. Bella: “Why am I covered in feathers?”

#13. Alice: "No one will dare to call you plain when I'm through with you."
Bella: "Only because they’re afraid you’ll suck their blood."

#12. Edward: "Oops."

#11. Renee: “Alice wouldn’t let us do anything else. Every time we tried, she all but ripped our throats out.”